ms-vindicta

eileen, shut up about your work already.

 

nobody wants to hear how you’ll be spending 1 month over at the dreaded PR side, then the second 1 and a half month over at the creative side, just because you were too soft-hearted to turn your woeful, puppy-dog eyed supervisor down.

 

nobody wants to hear how you suspect you’ll be doing alot more work than what you’re assigned to do, because the person you’ll be working with isn’t exactly all miss hardworking.

 

nobody wants to hear you go on and on about how you miss reading the papers everyday without having to keep an eye out for any coverage on the clients.

 

nobody wants to hear you. 

 

not even yourself.

 

 

 

 

i hopped into a cab after dinner at the boyfriend’s place.

 

cabbie: "wah, he live in sengkang and you live in jurong west, so far."

 

*thinks to self*

"this is so gonna be a long cab ride".  

 

*after cabbie finds out i’m 19 and the boyfriend’s 30*

 

"wah! so old ah! but good lah, they say older men will always love their young girlfriends alot. somemore, you’re pretty! so, got alot not?" 

 

"er, okay lah."

 

"sure got one lah. so, how many boyfriends have you got so far?"

 

*after finding out i had 4, exclaiming his surprise, and asking how long each one lasted,*

 

"so, the third one, 2 years long relationship. got give everything to him anot?"

 
*looks around uncomfortably*
"no". (note, my answer to this sort of question varies from occasion to occasion, and person to person)

 

"wah! good ah! ya lah, also good. don’t give better. but aiyah, i know men. they will always want. so ya lor, if you love the guy, then give lor. but better use protection. then this current one, got give everything?"

 

"no". (note, see above note)

 

"really anot? you can tell uncle one. no need to be shy."

 

i insist on my answer.

 

"ah. then you all go paktor, who pay? he or you? then got give you allowance every month?"

 

"sometimes he pays. sometimes i pay. no lah, we don’t calculate these sort of things."

 

"how can! i tell you ah, you must let the guy pay!"

 

"no lah. i earn my own keep, i can pay for myself." 

 

"no lah, you’re wrong. that’s where you’re wrong. let uncle tell you. he’s the guy, he won’t be at a disadvantage. so if you give him "stuff", you must make sure he pays lah."

 

*rolls eyes at his warped theory* 

"no lah, i still think i should spend only the money i earn for myself."

 

he then tries to force upon me his reasoning, and at this moment in time, i promptly "fell asleep".

 

geez, taxi drivers these days.

 

too kaypoh for their own good.

 

 

- - - - - - - - - -

 

if you haven’t already heard, i’m gonna be extending my attachment!

 

yes, for the next two months, i’ll be going over to the creatives, and be attached to one of the senior copywriters.

 

this is awesome cause other than journalism, i’ve always been wanting to try my hand at copywriting.

 

my supervisor (i’m eternally grateful to him) helped put in a word to the creative director, and he was surprisingly open about the idea of a copywriter intern though they haven’t had one before.

 

so yes, i’m gonna be b**** first ever copywriter intern!

 

 hopefully i live up to their expectations! (and the pay raise they’re gonna be issuing me as well. double the measly 450 bucks!)

 

also, my supervisor had initially wanted me to help out with a colleague from the PR side on some PR -based stuff, but because i’m honestly quite tired of PR and Account Servicing, i turned him down.

 

the colleague i’ll be helping is quite pushy by nature anyway (and a whole lot of stuff i’m not saying here) so i don’t think it’ll be easy and pleasant working with her.

 

i’m delirious at the thought of being able to do copywriting, although i’m quite thankful for all the opportunities i’ve been given to try both PR and account servicing.

 

i mean, i don’t think quite alot of people could boast of having tried PR, account servicing and creative all in a time span of 6 months.

 

  so yes, i’m horribly glad i was attached to b**** afterall.

 

remember colleague who made me take my first puff?

 

well, he’s an account manager over at o***** a***** and he rang me on friday, asking me if i wanted to join his team as an account executive since there’s an immediate opening.  

 

 

of course i turned him down since i still have one more semester of school to go.

 

the phone call did leave me with a "what was that all about?" feeling after i hung up though.

 

so yes, this is a little update on my life!

 

of course, working at b**** for two more months also means i get to meet the boyfriend for breakfast every morning for another two months, since his workplace is so near mine.

 

 

life couldn’t be better.

 

 

 

 

In this day and age, relationships are not official until they get declared on the internet. So since we aren’t official on Facebook yet, we’ll make it official here first.

 

And this is the obligatory introductory post, by THE BOYFRIEND.

 

It’s always hard for me to figure out what to write as an introduction. I mean, how in the world do you condense 30 years of person-building (not character. I have no character) into a few sentences?  

 

And come to think of it, shouldn’t the OWNER of the blog write about who she thinks her boyfriend is? I know I’ll be interested to find out.

 

In any case, welcome to my world.

 

Name: Edmund
Age: 29 going on 19
Chief Dislikes: Mozzies, stupidity and idiot drivers. All of which I believe should be made extinct.

 

Hobbies: whiskey, reading, pretending to play the guitar, dancing, staring at the owner for no apparent reason, cooking cheese omelettes, finding and seducing hot xmms, and getting them to teach me all kind of morally depraved acts

 

Main principles in life: I’ll try (almost) everything twice, toesocks and teletubbies are evil, and oh, Illegitimis non Carborandum.

 

Now that’s not much about me, and all the juicy bits, I’ll leave to the owner of the blog to tell you. So, msV what are YOUR thoughts about the boyfriend?

 

 

 

you guys would probably have noticed the huge plurk widget on your right.

 

yes, yours truly has made the switch from twitter to plurk!

 

not only is plurk more trustworthy (i get very irritated whenever twitter tells me i cannot read old twits), it’s more interactive, requires less brain juice, and is just a whole lot more fun.

 

along with this change, i recently decided to venture into the "sleevess-clothes" territory too, and with that, i made up my mind to start lifting weights to tone my arms.

 

and so i declared it on plurk.

 

 

and almost instantly, i got some sort of reaction from the barflies.

 

 

i didn’t see these msgs till i got back, and when i did, things got slightly more interesting.

 

 

now you see why plurk’s almost like instant messaging.

 

why, you even get a chance to talk to the all-elusive Qowboy Qaleb! (you do notice he is quite the expert in sexercise, r3gular comes a close second)

 

so join the CowboyBar on plurk today!

 

 

p.s: my arms have indeed became slightly toned. i’m not tellin’ from what though.  

 

this scene took place in my office on a weekday night, roughly at about 8.30 pm.

 

the only people around were the General Manager, my intern friend, colleague-who-doesn’t-take-me-seriously-cause-i-wear-short-dresses, and me.

 

the GM was there cause well, he was doing work. he usually stays in the office till about 10pm.

 

my intern friend and colleague WDTMSCIWSD (shortform for the very long sentence above) were there cause they had a press conference to prepare for the following day.

 

i was there cause i was printing stuff that couldn’t be printed during the working hours as it would hold up the printers.

 

now, you have to note that colleague WDTMSCIWSD isn’t exactly hardworking, and usually comes into the office only to stroll around languidly, gossiping with other colleagues from other departments while munching on snacks, and then leaves the office at 6 pm sharp just cause i quote her, "my darling hubby’s waiting for me!"

 

in other words, she was staying back late that day only cause my intern friend who’s under her had to stay late and she couldn’t possibly abandon her in front of the GM.

 

 

 just then, the GM starts packing his things, getting ready to take his leave.

colleague WDTMSCIWSD spies the GM leaving his desk, and goes,

 

"G! you’re leaving already? that’s pretty early for you, no?"

 

 

now when i heard her saying that, my first reaction was, "omg, now she’s gonna get it! she’s gonna get it!" and i was hopping with excitement, in anticipation of our quick-witted and sharp-tongued GM’s retort.

 

and i had it.  

 

 

the GM shoots her a side look, then goes,

 

"well, you wouldn’t know that, would you?"

 

 

right after he said that, colleague WDTMSCIWSD got a little flustered because she knew that was quite the truth and immediately tried to make light of the situation by haha-ing away.

 

meanwhile, i hid behind my computer screen and giggled together with my intern friend at her foolishness.

 

talk about shooting yourself in the foot.

 

 

 

and yes, i really do dislike colleague WDTMSCIWSD alot, cause she’s not only fat, she’s lazy, greedy, loud, and doesn’t take me seriously.

 

ahh… revenge is sweet.

 

 

 

 

i was on the train earlier on and i saw something that greatly disturbed me.

 

now, i was standing in the middle of the cabin and talking on the phone, when i felt someone’s foot pushing against mine.

so i turned behind, and saw this foreigner sleeping soundly on his seat, and because he was sliding a little down his seat, his foot hit mine.

 

and so i moved away.

 

about 30 seconds after i moved away, he started sliding down his seat.

of course, the people sitting beside him started shifting away from him, because he was sliding down so fast, he soon landed on the ground of the mrt train with a loud thud.  

 

he reeked of alcohol, and when he laid snoozing on the ground, he dribbled a little.

 

that was when this guy declared loudly that "he’s going to puke!", which caused a flurry of activity within the cabin as everyone rushed to move as far away as they could away from him.

 

now, that is understandable, cause if you see a drunkard and you figure he’s about to puke, your natural instinct would be to move away.

 

what happpened next was totally uncalled for though.

 

when the drunk foreigner slumped over on the ground, as if seeking a more comfortable position to lie in, two chinese guys sitting nearby whipped out their cameras and handphones and started snapping away.

 

while they gleefully took pictures, they laughed out loud, making snide comments about the drunk foreigner, saying things like how they should cover his face with a newspaper, how dirty and unkempt he looked, and how they were going to upload the videos and pictures to stomp and lianhe wanbao.

 

one of the guys even excitedly exclaimed that the pictures he took might make it to the headlines of lianhe wanbao. (which i highly doubt so. wanbao might be trashy, but still.)

 

what disgusted me even further was that when the drunk foreigner shifted his leg and it hit one of the chinese guy’s leg, he immediately gave it a kick without even considering if it would cause the foreigner pain.

 

while i looked on in disgust as the two guys and their companions mocked the poor drunk, i made up my mind to inform the mrt staff about the foreigner as soon as the train hit boon lay.

 

when we got to clementi, one of the chinese guys got out, and when he did, he made sure he declared loudly to the other guy whom he had just made friends with (cause both of them are rude idiots) to "remember to send the photos to stomp hor!"  

 

i was fuming inside for the foreigner, but by then, the other chinese guy had kept his camera, choosing instead to merely stare at the foreigner lying on the ground in front of him.  

 

when the train reached jurong east interchange, he got out, and a mrt staff entered the cabin.

 

he examined the foreigner, checking his wrist for a pulse, and rearranging his attire.

 

now, while the staff was doing that, there was this girl dressed in goth who filmed down the entire process with her handphone, smiling away, probably cause she thought it was very funny.

 

i stared hard at her.

 

when she saw how pissed i looked, her smile faded and she kept her handphone away.

 

when the train finally reached boon lay station, two other mrt staff entered and carried the foreigner away.

 

 

i’m truly disgusted by the behavior of these ugly singaporeans.

 

i feel for the foreigner. it’s a horrible feeling of unjust, repulsiveness, and mainly anger.  

 

how would you feel if you were drunk one day, fell into a deep slumber, and woke up the next day to find pictures of you splashed all across the papers and on websites?

 

somehow, i had the feeling that perhaps they were so callous, only because the drunk guy was a bangladeshi.

 

would singaporeans still whip out their phones eagerly if it was a fellow singaporean who was dead drunk on the train?  

 

i doubt so.

 

maybe the fault lies with sites and papers like stomp and wanbao, where readers are urged to send in pictures, just so.

 

that’s when people start taking pictures of every single thing they see, even when it is not their right to do so, as in this situation.

 

whatever it was, i left the train station with a bitter aftertaste in my mouth, sickened at the distasteful behaviour of our fellow singaporeans.  

we’ll let the pictures do the talking! (literally, cause i’m too lazy to bother with text. captions will do!)

 

the two mensa girlies.

 

i forgot how this picture was taken. i think i was trying to avert the avid shutterbug thiang. ("avert the avid"’s a bit of a tongue-twister isn’t it? heh.)

 

from here on, the pictures are all slightly crazy cause we had finished dinner and were just mucking around.

 

they are also heavily photoshopped cause (i won’t mince my words here), we all look like shit in the originals.  

 

 

were you trying to smack thiang’s head, shy?

 

 

 proper group shot.

 

 

okay, so the scene which took place before this picture was taken was this:

 

*scrambles around*

"come! come! let’s all take a shot with us pointing at thiang’s boobs since she’s the only flat-chested one among us!"

"okay okay! yay!"

*positions ourselves, big grins framing our faces*

*thiang wails*

 

 

er, we’ll leave the description for this to later.

 

this shot wasn’t as easy to take as it looks.

and i realised my cheekbones look quite scary.

 

i like this one best. it’s my wallpaper now!

 

less photoshop for this one. and i think thiang looks real cute here.

thiang, you should walk around with this expression permanently stuck on your face.

 

 

candid picture!

 

kimo’s right ear interests me.

 

kimo, sorry, unflattering pic! shyanne looks mysterious. thiang looks like she can’t speak properly. 

i look like a fish.

 

 

the girls forced us to take this.

 

 

shy, your hair is eating you up and threatening to eat me up as well.

 

 

i have no idea why thiang looks delirious.  

 

after dinner at fish and co, we then headed to arab street for sheesha!

 

 

 

it was my first time trying sheesha and being the enthusiastic little bee that i was, i buzzed around the pipe a little too much, taking in too deep breaths.

 

which of course, resulted in me feeling groggy after about half an hour.

the boyfriend did say i was a natural though.

 

it was a pretty good birthday in general, cause other than the fantastic company, i also had sincere wellwishes and cards!

thanks to sujith darling, nadia shah, kimo, thiang, shy, david, eric, uncle jay, posh jie jie, carrie, malcolm, daniel, karl, joshua, grace, cheryl, jiangrong, melvin, joanne, dave, benson, manda, xueting, derren, darryl, dee and all the barflies for your smses, tags, comments, facebook msgs!

 

special thanks to uncle jay too for his chalkboard drawing:

 

 

ah yes, he’s been calling me tadpole ever since he read that particular entry.

 

as for the cards …

 

 

 see that 作文纸 thinggy?

 

the boyfriend wrote me a letter on that, in chinese, totalling 4 pages!

now i can really tell people i’ve received a true blue 情书。 

i’m not about to reproduce the letter though, cause some points are for my *ahem* private reading only, and i’ll not be doing justice to his pretty handwriting by typing it out.

 

shyanne and kimberly also tried to fool me with my birthday gift, putting it in a ngee ann printed envelope and telling me it was something from mr shan.

 

 

of course i called their bluff.  

i ish not stewpid hor!

 

and well, if till now you still have yet to figure out who the new boyfriend is, you ought to be smacked. (the kissing picture’s big enough okay!)

 

he’s 30, (okay, altogether now, gasp!) and well, 11 years older than me.

 

see, i told you i liked my men old.

 

and you know what they say about older guys always wanting you to "grow up" and meet their maturity level? 

 

he is however, extrememly forgiving towards his nut of a girlfriend who has bouts of random crazinesss.

i do suspect it’s cause he’s pretty nutty himself.

also, i do have my mature moments. (they just don’t surface very much when he’s around) 

 

well, you guys’ll be seeing more of him in time to come, so the formalities can wait.

 

:D

 

over at the office, the PR team as well as some of the Account Servicing colleagues threw me a surprise birthday party.

 

basically, they all left their seats around 6, and it was just me, and my supervisor around. (let’s call him D)

 

so D walked up to me, and asked if we could talk.

 

of course my natural instinct told myself, "eileen, you’re in deep shit" but i still waited to see what he would say.

 

he asked,

 

"eileen, have you heard anything bad about your working attitude from S and N lately?"

 

S and N are the colleagues who delegate the bulk of the work to me.

 

"no, why?"

 

"oh, cause … (long pause) they’ve been telling me some stuff about you. are you sure they haven’t told you anything?"

 

*thinks hard, then decides to be honest, which was a pretty dumb move*

 "well, for S not really. As for N, she just told me to be more careful cause i’m getting a little careless due to me being so busy."

 

"ahhh.. come, let’s head to the boardroom so we can have a better talk."

 

*follows D into boardroom, spies someone’s ass, and knows immediately what they’re up to*

 

the next half an hour was then spent being touched over them taking pains to plan the surprise, making my thank you speech, cutting the yummy cake, then muching on it and the gummy bears which were used to adorn it, and wondering to myself how stupid i was to spill to D my flaws when he obviously weren’t picking on them.

 

 

and the worse thing is, i had decided that when it’s time for me to bade my goodbyes, i would only write cards/notes to the colleagues whom i like and are nice to me, and totally ignore the rest.

 

unfortunately, since they’re all so nice, (well, maybe only because it’s my birthday), i can’t possibly be discriminatory and only write to some of them.

 

still, i don’t want to be a two-faced hypocrite.

 

i think i shall choose nice cards for the genuinely nice colleagues, and generic, slightly-fugly ones for the rest.

 

heh.

 

and hereso ends the post-birthday entry.

 

i’m 19!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

i’m officially nineteen.

 

i’ve also officially abandoned my "single" status.

 

 

more details tomorrow! 

i’m fully aware i keep posting memes as entries but i’m in the midst of drafting one titled "my dream kid" and i need more time!

 

need to look for pictures you know.

 

anyway, meme!

 

as a sidenote, do you know the term "meme" was first coined by richard dawkins in "the selfish gene" back in 1976?

i think it sounds cute, just like how i think "blob" sounds squishy-cute, and "blurb" abruptly-cute.

 

okay, i know, i’m weird.

 

and so, random fact 1 of the day.

 

1. i like english. alot. i don’t quite know all the rules and shit but i can tell where exactly the grammatical errors are when i look at a sentence. i don’t know what’s a verb, i think i know what’s a noun. i know what’s an adjective. i can’t quite remember what’s a dangling modifier. (writ comm horrors!)

 

2. i really want my future kid to be dark and mysterious and named clementine. (more on this in the next entry) 

 

3. i pop mints like crazy. specifically eclipse spearmint mints. at close to 4 bucks a tin, this is an expensive habit, especially when it’s nearly 1 tin a day.

but you know what’s special about eclipse mints? 

even after you pop all of ‘em, you don’t get a tummyache. try that with ricola or lakerol and i guarantee you that after half a box, your tummy’ll be stirring uncomfortably. one box later, you’ll be in the toilet shitting your guts out. eclipse is king.

 

4. i prefer my dad to my mum. she flares up for nothing then vents her anger on everyone. that’s reason enough for me to dislike her.

 

5. i dislike, or rather, can’t make small talk. this is why during bar outings, i usually sit beside someone and start talking to him/her about his/her ambitions/goals in life/whether he likes his job. (tehsi, you would know this very well, i presume. ) it is however, quite hard to make serious talk when rick price/TK is screeching "heaven knows" into your ear. 

 

6. i like talking to myself/clementine/things. so far, i’ve made conversation with my laptop, the desktop in the office, the scanner, the photocopier, the paperclips, the binding machine, my shoes, my clothes and my handphone.

i am perfectly sane though. clementine can play testament to that.  

 

7. i burst into tears when i’m angry. when i’m unhappy/sad, i talk to myself.

 

8. i like wearing dresses cause they’re so convenient. i like them short cause airiness = not so hot. yes, even at the risk of people not taking me seriously.

 

9. i like everything strawberry-ish.

 

10. i have really rough knees cause i fell down at least thrice a month back when i was a kid. these days, i’m still as clumsy. i trip, but i always catch myself before i land on my ass.

 

11. i’m obsessed about my weight. i usually hover around 45kg, but i want to be about 40 and still keep my boobs. maybe 39. i don’t know.

 

12. i like my legs best. then my boobs. then my eyelashes. and my lips!

 

13. i like my arms least. chunky, lard-ridden trunks of fat.

 

14. when i like a particular food, i can keep eating it and never get sick of it. i had fish soup 384 days out of 728 days (2 years). this unfortunately, doesn’t apply to human beings.

 

15. i like to plan ahead and stick to a routine. this is why i make sure i read every single blog on my blogroll every single day even when i’m dead tired. it’s also why i have to shower first before having breakfast, then read the papers while eating and waiting for my hair to dry. if my routine gets upset, i get upset.

 

16. i used to enjoy reading the papers. then i joined b****, and had to do media monitoring.

the straits times, the new paper, the business times, today, my paper, wanbao, zaobao and shinmin. i read all of them everyday.

when it’s monday, i have to read through 3 days worth of newspapers. now, i can’t stand the sight of them.

 

17. and i hate mondays.

 

18. when i was a kid, i used to like biting people. now, people like *coughs* leaving me bites.

 

19. i was in the executive committee of the prefectorial board for all 4 years of my secondary school life. 

 i was monitress for the first 3 years only cause me and melvin (he was my partner-in-crime for all 3 years as well) got sick of being in charge of a class where all the boys were juvenile and stupid and decided to tell our teacher that we didn’t want to take on the same role anymore.

yes, i is miss goody-two-shoes.

 

20. i still want sea angels, a sloth, tadpoles and salamanders as pets.

and oh, serangoon central sells REALLY fat goldfishes. but i don’t quite fancy them anymore.

they sell cute, tiny pufferfish though. heh.

 

and that’s it!

 

i tag thiang, shy, kimo, sujith and anyone who wants to do this.

 

 

tomorrow’s my birthday, as well as the announcement of something big!

 

can’t wait!

i feel like you don’t quite care.

 

and you, you’re always sarcastic though you say you’re not.

 

you gross me out when you trudge all around the office, sitting on tables and gossiping, muching on food as the fat spills out from your jeans.

 

you’re so childish i can’t believe you’re 25. and i roll my eyes everytime i hear you on the phone in that pixie voice.

 

you touch my stuff one too often.

 

you’re so stuckup.

 

you ought to grow some backbone.

 

you need to be less lazy and stop flooding me with work.

 

you should start standing up for yourself.

 

you need to stop reading my blog cause knowing you do somehow disgusts me.  

 

you need to stop behaving like a i-know-it-all bitch. just cause you have it doesn’t mean others can’t. and you need to lose weight.

 

 

and eileen, you need to stop complaining about random people.

but since it’s your blog, you’re forgiven.

 

 

 

just not in a good mood lah.